What Do You Believe?

Shifting the Thoughts That No Longer Serve

Do you believe that the world is a dangerous place that requires you to be on guard all the time? Or do you believe that the world is a benevolent place that returns to you the energy that you give? There’s no right answer. It’s just a belief. And a belief is just a thought you keep thinking.

However, what we believe to be true affects how we move through and experience the world. This is not a new concept, but it is definitely one worth repeating. I know I need to remind myself of this often!

I recently listened to an inspiring conversation about the power of belief on Oprah Winfrey’s podcast. Her guest was Shawn Achor, author of the book The Power of Beliefs: How Strengthening Seven Core Beliefs Predicts Greater Success and a Better Life. If this conversation sounds interesting, click here to listen to the episode.

I really enjoyed the stories and the research he shared about how our beliefs can lead us or limit us, and how they can shift. Thank goodness beliefs can change. It took me a long time to believe my life could be joyful even if my mother continued drinking. I’m still working on shifting the belief that I can only feel peace if everything goes the way I’d like it to. That’s one that causes a lot of us to suffer.

One of the most helpful beliefs they discussed was knowing that our choices matter. I’ve learned over and over again that when I make a choice from fear, it eventually comes back to haunt me. When I make a choice from love, it inevitably brings more love into my life. Regardless of what other people are doing, I always feel better when I make choices from my heart.

Not only is it important to remember that our choices matter, it’s even more important to know that YOU matter. It’s not a secret that there is a loneliness epidemic happening in our country. It makes me sad to think there are so many people who feel like life has passed them by or no one cares about them. I’ve certainly had moments like that in my life, and I’m grateful for the people who were there to show me otherwise.

So if you’re in that place and you’re reading these words, I’d like to remind you that you are loved and you matter. Just for being you. There are countless people who have been touched by your presence. Even if you made mistakes while doing your best to love them, they would not be who they are had you not been part of their life.

This point was beautifully illustrated in Toy Story 5, the latest film in the Pixar franchise about toys coming to life when humans aren’t around. Jessie, the spirited cowgirl doll, feels like there must be something wrong with her. Every child who plays with her grows up and loses interest.

I won’t give away any spoilers, but I will say Jessie learns that she had a lasting impact on one of those little girls. She eventually realizes her only job is bringing joy to whatever child she’s with in the present moment. And that’s an important job! The dedication in the film’s ending credits says it perfectly:

Dedicated to our loved ones, past and present, who were there for us at the right time. You mattered.

To everyone reading this…you matter. Your worth isn’t measured by what you have or have not done. I can’t convince you of that if you don’t believe it for yourself. But I can tell you my life started getting a whole lot better once I began examining and jettisoning old, limiting beliefs that simply weren’t serving me.

If you could use some help shifting your beliefs, I would be honored to assist you with a Spiritual Coaching session or a series of sessions. We can examine the beliefs that feel pretty awful together, and then find ways to release them.

Often, there’s a belief hiding in our unconscious mind that we’re not even aware of. That’s when Family Constellations can be a game changer. It reveals and heals hidden beliefs we inherited from our ancestors so we can start moving forward again. That’s what happened for me back in 2012 after I attended my first Family Constellations workshop. For more on that story, you can read the article I wrote on Substack last month titled The Courage to Belong.

If you’re getting a nudge to try Family Constellations, consider booking a private session or joining my next online event, “Finding Your Place,” happening Saturday, August 29. All the details are on the Events page of my website.

This week, I invite you to take a moment to examine your beliefs and discern which ones are helpful and which ones are not. Then do your best to focus on the beliefs that feel expansive and hopeful.

Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.

~ Henry Ford